The Last Lunch

I am now in a new city, totally stranger and alone. I certainly do not know anyone except for few co-workers. I have left behind so many things, people and moments. But, all of them together form me. It's a Saturday, where I can sit and contemplate, in retrospect or in future. Past few weeks have been totally hectic and exciting. Traveling all across the country on a train and bus, to slow down the pace of life and observe. Meeting strangers, making new friends and meeting old friends. Life has been good a little tough though with lots to learn. My past 6 years after I left BHU have been so so incredibly hard on me that one point of time I felt I need to give up. But, then there was something which I call Hope.. it kept me. Suddenly, I feel like writing about that one Man who is the only one who was supportive throughout for 5 years. Yes, that's my adviser. Dr Bakshi. In a sense he was my employer, but nothing less than a father figure. He himself has done a lot, tried to change the whole system (failed and learnt). But what is life to have never tried ? I learn from him and I ponder how he manages to infuse so much enthusiasm to everyone he meets. So, before I was setting out from Columbus (where I did my PhD and stayed for 5 years) he called for a farwell lunch. We went out as a group. Had fun, talked so much, work, research and in general life. And Dr Bakshi's awesome Son - Harshal !. He never preaches or anything, he just observes and act very patiently and with compassion with you. He is a true leader. Not manager because he believes in leading and not managing everything you do ! (From him I learnt, we need to be Leaders and Not managers... if you lead well results follow !). In the final Farewell he said - "Life is always made up of Positives and Negatives and If you focus on Positive for even 60 % of your lifetime you have lived your life well. And That is all That matters". His words will be with me always. He has inspired, guided and taught me a lot. Mixed with determination and grit to take Life by its horns and keep moving. Nothing is ever going to stop me, because I had met this Father figure, who was not preachy but a leader by his action.

So, whererver you are ! Keep Living and Keep Inspiring ! You never know how many lives you touch.


Live, Love, Laugh and Inspire ... !

Shweta

Living With a Disease

This is dedicated to all the people around me or far who suffer from a life threatening disease. It is so easy to relate to someone who is close to you, what one must be suffering. But it is so difficult to think about someone who is not at all related to you. The very fact that, tragedies don seem inevitable unless it happens to you comes so alive in such situations.

Today, one of my classmate's grand mom went for her heavenly abode. He was so sad, and the way he expresses was that she was so fit when he was back in India just 10 days ago. How uncertain life seems then. It takes a great deal of heart to go through the sense of loss of someone whom you would have hung around, talked, shared hopes, joy and sorrows... all these small bits and pieces of life. Sudden, vacancy in life. And this is all when your life really did not revolve around that one person. I cannot even imagine the pain on loss of your own sibiling, son, daughter, mom or dad. It would be so horrible. And when I think all this, I think about my dad and my mom, both of them now a permanent sufferers. My dad suffers from Chronic Kidney Disease and my mom has multiple things including ulcers, arthritis, tumor and diabetes. I just close my eyes for a second and cudn't bear the darkness. I just cannot make through a single day without the hope of future. The old age doesn't look so promising when you think that your life has been failure, the sense that you really could not do enough. And here at the stage, you again stand crippled. Its all age ! My friend said, that his adviser was detected breast cancer and it is at an early stage. She has two young kids, and the news come as shocking. And certainly I am not in a position to judge her pain when she is only 35 and is a young professor with so many hopes from her life. The hopes of seeing her children grow and making it a life worth living. All I can do is contemplate over what she must be thinking ! and in a sense like others pass a judgement that Ohh Bad ! its so tough. Well, when we talked I think I tried to make a point that its tougher at old age when you do not hope for anything else. To which few think that atleast you would be satisfied that you lived your life and you accomplished ! Certainly if that's true. But so many people live discontented and struggle throughout their lives. And after struggling at the end when you face a situation where you see the end results of struggle are yet another disappointment in life then what ? Should the life be easy to bear ? Whatever is left ? I do not think that is easy too. And I would not consider young age to be tougher than old age when you are capable of so many possibilities. When you have the energy to fight back ! What about those old people who cannot even walk ? Or cannot dream ? Just because they are 70 does that mean that they loose privilege of still dreaming or hope ? or does it mean that you are only allowed to live happily till you are 70 or 75 ? What about their rest of life - whatsoever is left ? Does it not matter that whatever life they are left with they should have the highest privilieg of living it the best ? Why this discrimination about age ? What if I am70, I do still want to dream and do not want to cripple my life and it is as much a disappointment to life as much as it is for a young age. May be I can think this, because I interact with a sick man , my Dad everyday. It hurts to feel helpless to be not even infuse any sense of hope. Where even if you say to the person that you are alive.. he/she responds as a lifeless body ! All he/she sees is an inevitable future which will be more crippled than this and he will not be able to do anything about it. I think its the hope that keeps us alive. And anyone who is old, he/she should not be made felt that he has already lived his life.

Life without Hope is riskier than any other disease of the world !. So, I wish and I hope that whosoever is sick and at whatever stage of life, people do not kill the hope.. don ever say to an old parent that you have lived.. tell that you are alive and you have many years of hope.. you have so many possibilities left.. And hope would make everyday brighter , the human will to fight for life makes life worth living. All other achievements are mere a dash between the years you lived.

A Salute to all the people living and fighting to live. Live, laugh and inspire.

A Story

This story was sent to me by one of my Indian Army Friends and it quite caught me !! Here it goes as it is...

A real story ...A conversation between a passenger and Software Engineer in
Shatabdi Train in India...........An interesting and a must read!

Vivek Pradhan was not a happy man.. Even the plush comfort of the
air-conditioned compartment of the Shatabdi express could not cool his
frayed nerves. He was the Project Manager and still not entitled to air
travel. It was not the prestige he sought, he had tried to reason with the
admin person, it was the savings in time. As PM, he had so many things to
do!!

He opened his case and took out the laptop, determined to put the time to
some good use.

'Are you from the software industry sir?' the man beside him was staring
appreciatively at the laptop. Vivek glanced briefly and
mumbled in affirmation, handling the laptop now with exaggerated care and
importance as if it were an expensive car.

'You people have brought so much advancement to the country, Sir. Today
everything is getting computerized.'

'Thanks,' smiled Vivek, turning around to give the man a look. He always
found it difficult to resist appreciation. The man was young
and stockily built like a sportsman..... He looked simple and strangely out
of place in that little lap of luxury like a small town
boy in a prep school. He probably was a railway sportsman making the most
of his free traveling pass.

'You people always amaze me,' the man continued, 'You sit in an office and
write something on a computer and it does so many big things outside.'

Vivek smiled deprecatingly. Naiveness demanded reasoning not anger. 'It is
not as simple as that my friend. It is not just a question of
writing a few lines. There is a lot of process that goes behind it.'

For a moment, he was tempted to explain the entire Software Development
Lifecycle but restrained himself to a single statement.
'It is complex, very complex.'

'It has to be. No wonder you people are so highly paid,' came the reply.

This was not turning out as Vivek had thought. A hint of belligerence crept
into his so far affable, persuasive tone.

'Everyone just sees the money. No one sees the amount of hard work we have
to put in. Indians have such a narrow concept of hard work. Just because we
sit in an air-conditioned office, does not mean our brows do not sweat. You
exercise the muscle; we exercise the mind and believe me that is no less
taxing.'

He could see, he had the man where he wanted, and it was time to drive home
the point.

'Let me give you an example. Take this train. The entire railway
reservation system is computerized. You can book a train ticket
between any two stations from any of the hundreds of computerized booking
centers across the country. Thousands of transactions accessing a single
database, at a time concurrently; data integrity, locking, data security.
Do you understand the complexity in designing and coding such a system?'

The man was awestruck; quite like a child at a planetarium. This was
something big and beyond his imagination.

'You design and code such things?'

'I used to,' Vivek paused for effect, 'but now I am the Project Manager.'

'Oh!' sighed the man, as if the storm had passed over,

'so your life is easy now.'

This was like the last straw for Vivek. He retorted, 'Oh come on, does life
ever get easy as you go up the ladder. Responsibility only brings more
work. Design and coding! That is the easier part. Now I do not do it, but I
am responsible for it and believe me, that is far more stressful. My job is
to get the work done in time and with the highest quality. To tell you
about the pressures, there is the customer at one end, always changing his
requirements, the user at the other, wanting something else, and your boss,
always expecting you to h ave finished it yesterday.'

Vivek paused in his diatribe, his belligerence fading with
self-realization. What he had said, was not merely the outburst of a
wronged man, it was the truth. And one need not get angry while defending
the truth.

'My friend,' he concluded triumphantly, 'you don't know what it is to be in
the Line of Fire'.

The man sat back in his chair, his eyes closed as if in realization. When
he spoke after sometime, it was with a calm certainty that
surprised Vivek.

'I know sir,..... I know what it is to be in the Line of Fire......'

He was staring blankly, as if no passenger, no train existed, just a vast
expanse of time.

'There were 30 of us when we were ordered to capture Point 4875 in the
cover of the night. The enemy was firing from the top.
There was no knowing where the next bullet was going to come from and for
whom. In the morning when we finally hoisted the tri-colour at the top only
4 of us were alive.'

'You are a...?'

'I am Subedar Sushant from the 13 J&K Rifles on duty at Peak 4875 in
Kargil. They tell me I have completed my term and can opt for a soft
assignment. But, tell me sir, can one give up duty just because it makes
life easier? On the dawn of that capture, one of my colleagues lay injured
in the snow, open to enemy fire while we were hiding behind a bunker. It
was my job to go and fetch that soldier to safety. But my captain sahib
refused me permission and went ahead himself. He said that the first pledge
he had taken as a Gentleman Cadet was to put the safety and welfare of the
nation foremost followed by the safety and welfare of the men he
commanded... ....his own personal safety came last, always and every time.'

'He was killed as he shielded and brought that injured soldier into the
bunker.. Every morning thereafter, as we stood guard, I could see
him taking all those bullets, which were actually meant for me . I know
sir....I know, what it is to be in the Line of Fire.'

Vivek looked at him in disbelief not sure of how to respond. Abruptly, he
switched off the laptop.

It seemed trivial, even insulting to edit a Word document in the presence
of a man for whom valour and duty was a daily part of life;
valour and sense of duty which he had so far attributed only to epical
heroes.

The train slowed down as it pulled into the station, and Subedar Sushant
picked up his bags to alight.

'It was nice meeting you sir.'

Vivek fumbled with the handshake.

This hand... had climbed mountains, pressed the trigger, and hoisted the
tri-colour. Suddenly, as if by impulse, he stood up at attention
and his right hand went up in an impromptu salute....

It was the least he felt he could do for the country.

PS: The incident he narrated during the capture of Peak 4875 is a true-life
incident during the Kargil war. Capt. Batra sacrificed his
life while trying to save one of the men he commanded, as victory was
within sight. For this and various other acts of bravery, he was
awarded the Param Vir Chakra, the nation's highest military award.

Live humbly, there are great people around us, let us learn!

I do try to see everyday in everyone's face what they might be going through.. and I salute the human spirit of fighting their own unique battle everyday !! 

Not to forget the mention of one of my friend's thought.. as we walked together she told me about her grandfather's illness which was completely unknown to me even though I lived with her for so much time. I was so surprised with myself that in my own little world and my own thoughts I never thought about why she never talked about her grandfather ? And today I was so full of respect for her , for she lives all the tough thoughts and never even complains !! never even lets it effect what lives around her !!! How does she do that ? But indeed she inspired me .. she showed me how important it is to take care of things which we are blessed with !!! 

Thanks to this friend for making me realise once again that all of us have our own unique battles and we should indeed be respectful and humble to each other's life... 

"Live, love .. laugh and inspire.. you never know how many lives you touch !!! "

The Bike Vs The Chair

A cool breeze morning and cloudy day. As the day begins I ride my bike to ISKCON temple. The serenity of starting day and promise to smile filled me with joy. The time to go to work, on bike like free cruise over the vast greenery of my beautiful university shows me different faces of life. The decent made the bike ride so easy and enchanting, but in the sense of that joy I forgot the upcoming incline which would slow me down and will force me to put extra effort. The upward incline and I slowed down, pedaling harder to get up the incline and cursing the land topography. Why it has to be up incline to force me work so hard ? And at this moment I completely forgot the joy I had few seconds ago. How selfish I was ? Why I didn't thank for the joy and why I cursed for the hard work ?  These thoughts did not even come while I was riding my bike till I saw a guy on a wheelchair. A young lad of about 24-25, with a cigerate on his lips, contentment on his face of sitting on that chair which helped him to move around and not sitting on a place to regret of disability to move around. As the incline came his hands started moving faster with all the might they could.. on the wheels... And the contentment of riding up the incline made me realize that I had the best bike and best feet in this world. !!!

Realize what we have !! Realize that every joy is followed by sorrow and vice-versa. Do not stop to curse .. Live the moment with the best you have.. Give the best you can... And Today I thank that unknown stranger who drove his wheel chair and Inspired me and gave me a will to live my sorrows. Remember to live your life.. You never know how many lives you touch !!

Live, Love, Laugh.. and Inspire !!!